I have put blood, sweat, tears and a money into this. My videos look like shit, I stutter, I can't focus, I know shit all about editing.
I have the support from my friends and my partner. I have a premise and the personality and the determination.
But fuck if I ain't already recalculating this. I am having such a hard time with the learning of it all.
I want to continue and I want to go forward and I want to make things work with what I have. I compare myself to others and I see what I need and what I don't need. But in my head I am convinced I need to have more things to make the final content that I am used to seeing.
Just putting this out into the void. I needed to vent more. I am having an awful time.
I just want to be a fucking You Tuber. I just wan't to make funny videos about makeup. I just want to inspire people how others inspire me.
Youtube needs more Indigenous ladies anyways.